Body 337 Jokes that are not funny
Whether it is Huo Xiaoyu from Luoyang or Xue Chuer, Du Qiuniang and Yan Lingbin, they are all extremely talented women cultivated by the family, each of them is Bing Xue smart, clear and exquisite, otherwise they would not dominate in Chang'an Huafang.
The face is easy to pass away, the face is easy to age, life is short, the vicissitudes of life, everything is like a passing cloud, a mirror and a moon, in the changes of the world, the glory and wealth are impermanent, why don't the four daughters sigh their fate in their hearts?
But as the land of fireworks and willows, they can't help themselves, even if they have saved enough money to redeem themselves now, they are afraid that they will not be able to get out of the control of these families, not to mention that they also know that they are just a tool to earn money for others in the flower shop.
can only hope that these families, when their faces are twilight, can let themselves redeem themselves and leave, and find a good family to live, but this kind of life is difficult for them.
And for them, the most likely encounter is that the family has not seen a newcomer emerge in the past few years, and they seek more money with them, and when a newcomer emerges, they will become the family's private playthings, and if they are lucky, maybe the family will keep her in the house until she becomes an old woman and becomes an old maid in the family.
If you are unlucky, then you can only be at the banquet and socialization of the family, if you are favored by the friends of the family, and then give them to your friends, so that they begin to wander, like objects, tossing and turning between them, and being given back and forth, until one day their former flower names no longer arouse anyone's interest, and they are like wild dogs and wild cats wandering the streets, abandoned and left to fend for themselves.
Li Hong naturally accepted their big gifts, and he couldn't afford to accept anyone's big gifts in the world, so watching the four girls kneel down to their Ying Ying, Li Hong also smiled and didn't think there was anything wrong with this.
What's more, in this world, the communicative bond between literati and famous prostitutes is assisted by this talent, and the four women were impressed by a poem, which did not make people feel that there was anything wrong, but what was shocking was that a poem actually convinced the four Oiran!
This made the scholars in the audience can't help but feel deep jealousy and envy, how good it would be if they could give such a poem! Wouldn't he be able to smile and help them up one by one, those few beauties who can make people intoxicated, and even get their secret permission, and then whether he is like the deeds of Li Yaxian and Zheng Yuanhe, it will become a good story in Chang'an City.
In addition to the wide-eyed and envious scholars in the audience, Zheng Xingtai and Lu Ao were also shocked in their hearts, but these two people don't think so, poetry is a good poem, an absolute masterpiece, and it is definitely enough to be passed down through the ages!
But what is the purpose of composing such a poem in front of the four four Oiran who are in their prime? Are you here to rebel? Are you trying to sow discord? Originally, these talented and beautiful women, each of them had their own little Jiujiu in their hearts, and they wished they had the opportunity to quickly escape from the land of fireworks and willow lanes, just like that Li Yaxian.
Zheng Xingtai and Lu Ao looked at Li Hong, who was calm and calm on the stage, even if they dig the corner of the wall, there is no obvious digging of the foot of the wall as you do, a poem woke up the four major Oiran, if because of your poem, they all have the idea of redemption, what support do we rely on for this flower shop? What else do we make money on? Do you have to be reduced to a second-rate flower shop?
The two who were glaring angrily had no intention of going on stage to reason with Li Hong, but when they heard Pei Wanying's words next to them, the two couldn't calm down at all, and immediately rushed to the stage.
I saw Pei Wanying turn her head and glance at Yang Wu who was standing there, and asked with a faint smile: "Your son-in-law is really talented and courageous, is this to take all the four famous Oirans of Chang'an into his own possession?" A song "Generations of Sorrowful Pulsatilla" impressed and fell in love with the four Oiran, it seems that your son-in-law should redeem himself for which one, otherwise he would never make such a gorgeous and magnificent, and there is a great poem that warns the world of philosophy, do you have enough silver? Which of these redemption fees is sky-high for ordinary people? ”
Yang Wu glanced at Pei Wanying, of course he knew in his heart who His Highness was here for today, but when he heard Miss Pei say that His Highness might redeem the beauties on the stage, then he thought that His Highness would redeem them as Miss Pei said.
After thinking about it, he saluted Pei Wanying respectfully, and then said: "If Miss Hui is back, the old slave has brought enough money, if Miss wants them to wait for the son, the money on the old slave is no problem for the four people to redeem themselves together." ”
The court thought of Yangwu is actually the same as the thinking of everyone in this period of the Tang Dynasty, in their opinion, it is normal for the young lady to want to find a few beauties to serve the son.
Not to mention His Royal Highness the Prince, it is a normal wealthy family in Chang'an City, if his husband has a crush on a woman from which family, it is normal for the wife to help marry another one.
Pei Wanying listened to Yangwu's words, and couldn't help but be startled, this slave is so big! However, there was still a bit of a surprise for Yang Wu's respectful attitude towards him, especially Yang Wu's respectful saluting movements, which seemed to exude a sense of nobility, not like an ordinary slave.
After a conversation between the two, Zheng Xingtai and Lu Ao almost spit out a mouthful of old blood! With such a big breath, he even dared to pack the ticket beyond his strength, even if he redeemed the four people, there was no problem!
You are the Royal Bank! The money was made by your son-in-law! Redeem yourself for four? These four people will take out one of them at random, and the high value will scare you to death! Otherwise, they can be called all knowing? It can be enshrined as one of the four great oirans!
You should be the ordinary top girl of those ordinary flower shops in Pingkangfang! It's overwhelming!
Although the two of them thought so in their hearts, they glanced at the serious Yangwu, and it didn't look like the arrogance of telling lies and lies.
Angrily, he turned his head to look at the stage again, Zheng Xingtai and Lu Ao's eyes almost fell out! What a situation! It's only a long time, the kid is holding Yan Lingbin's cheek and stroking it, and he is still whispering with his sideburns, listening to Yan Lingbin's chuckle like a silver bell from time to time, the whole person laughs with flowers and branches, and he doesn't care that the kid's hands are on her soft and delicate waist.
What was even more unexpected next was that Xue Chu'er actually took the initiative to come up, and even saluted the disciple first? Whether it is Zheng Xingtai and Lu Ao in the audience, or many literati and artists, they are stupid when they look at the scene on the stage!
What's wrong with the world? A very talented poem, is it so easy to make the four Oirans fall in love?
What they couldn't accept the most was that the four beauties on the stage, who had always been proud of their ice and jade cleanliness and self-cleanliness, and did not sell their bodies, actually let the disciples of Naden put their arms around their waists.
"What? Do you want to hear stories too? Okay, so how about I tell you another story about how bad a beast is? The disciples on the stage hugged left and right, looked at Xue Chu'er's cheeks, and said as if biting his ears with his lips close to others' ears. The other hand was caressing Yan Lingbin's soft and delicate waist at the same time.
Du Qiuniang stood beside her, frowned lightly and muttered: "Childe's song "Generations of Sorrowful Pulsatilla" is enough to make the slaves empowered, and their eyes suddenly brightened, and they know that in this beautiful year, they should plan for the future, and they must not waste the beautiful scenery like this, and with the passage of time, the years will be wasted." It's just that I don't know the story of this beast, what can I inspire the slave family and others? ”
"Oh, this story is amazing, can it tell you, what do you want to boldly pursue? Life is as short as a white horse, if you blindly look ahead, fear of wolves and tigers, when you are old, your hair will be gray, your teeth will fall out, your face will be wrinkled, and your body will be clumsy, and you will regret it at that time. Deng Disciple said with the blessings of all people.
Women are all people who love beauty, especially the four great Oirans who are famous in Chang'an, and they eat by their posture, and when they hear Li Hong say that they are old, they all can't help but show fear, timidity, and disgust.
"Then please teach me, sir." Huo Xiaoyu is a gift again, and the girls are completely impressed by Li Hong's poem "Generations of Sorrowful Pulsatilla", there is no way, this poem is simply tailor-made for them, and it is difficult not to impress them.
"Okay, since your thirst for knowledge is so strong, then I'll tell you, listen well: it is said that there is a scholar who wants to go to the capital to catch the exam, and he is going with him is a confidante who loves him, the two are respectful of each other along the way, never beyond the distinction between men and women, one day in a hurry encountered a downpour, so he hurriedly found an inn to stay in ......." While Li Hong was telling the story, he looked at some scholars in the audience who had not really understood the poem he had just recited, and he couldn't help but feel a little disappointed.
Did these scholars really only say that the poem they read was to warn these women in the fireworks alley, and did not mean to warn them? Looking at a scholar, looking at himself with envy and hatred, Li Hong felt that these people did not have the first place in the imperial examination, otherwise he would not be the only one who would be harmed, but the entire Tang Dynasty.
"Tell me quickly, why don't you say it?" Yan Lingbin, who was caressing his waist, urged in Li Hong's ear.
"Oh, what about after the two complained about an inn, but there was only one room left, what should I do? So the two had to stay overnight, not to mention that the scholar was courteous to the woman along the way, so the woman let him sleep with him in the same bed at night, but it was ....... ”
"But what?" Xue Chu'er hurriedly asked.
Although they say that they are all as guarded as jade, after all, they are immersed in the land of fireworks all day long, and their thoughts are more open than the style of men and women in the Tang Dynasty, so they don't feel that there is anything wrong with sleeping in the same bed.
"However, the woman and the man agreed on three chapters, and the two were afraid that they would exceed the etiquette system at night, so the woman put a piece of paper between the two of them, on which the word beast was written, and told the scholar that if you crossed the line at night, you would be a beast."
"It's all in accordance with the etiquette, whether it's the scholar or the woman, it's all people we admire. What's next? Xue Chu'er turned around and asked.
"When she got up early the next morning, the woman was furious when she saw that the note had been put on the last night, and she had not moved at all!"
"Why are you angry?"
"Thou art better than a beast! Then the woman walked away, not accompanying the scholar to take the exam. ”
“…… Belch....... ”
"It's ......."
"Isn't it funny?" Someone is a little silly, why don't they laugh?
"Hmph, the beasts don't ......." If you leave halfway through, press CTRL+D to save the current page to your favorites so you can watch it later!