But things are not always as easy as imagined.

These three rounds of 1v1 had a great impact on Liu Jiangqing's heart, and he was beaten so much that he didn't even know himself. The operation technique is clumsy, the reaction is slow, the consciousness is weak, and the stupidity can only be described by the word rookie. Coupled with Heng Dao Yijian's rather sharp judgments, the shame in his heart became stronger and stronger, and he unconsciously began to ask himself: Now me, is it really me?

In the past, when he was in Mingyue Pavilion, Liu Jiangqing was a well-known "serious maniac" and "concentration maniac" in the team. Although he looks very free and easy on the surface, likes to turn on the machine with his feet, and speaks straightforwardly, he is actually very strict with himself. Wake up early and go to bed early every day, and complete the training and study plan of the day on time without delay. And he also attaches great importance to his appearance, whether it is participating in the competition or training with the team on weekdays, he is dressed neatly and neatly, and he always looks energetic.

It was because of his extreme seriousness that he became the first to condemn himself when the team lost 0:10 to the bloody battle. Liu Jiangqing couldn't forgive himself for causing the team to suffer great humiliation, and fell into a terrible whirlpool of self-blame in his heart, out of control, without the need for insults from the outside world, he was already ashamed of himself as a sinner in Mingyue Pavilion. After leaving the team, his mind changed dramatically, and he became a perverse eccentric.

I thought that as long as I changed the environment and put all my energy into work, I would be able to completely jump out of the whirlpool. But Liu Jiangqing has now finally realized that trying to divert attention to avoid the cowardice in his heart is delusional in itself. This cowardice is like a rotten sore, rotting into the flesh and into the bone marrow over time. It turned him into a pale waste, so depressed that he couldn't find himself.

“…… Two years can't make the second day, but you can make a waste. Waste is not qualified to talk about revenge, I gave up. Liu Jiangqing suddenly felt a pain in his heart after typing out these lines heavily, and realized that it was the rotten sores that were in pain, and he knew that he was really hopeless. The 0:10 scoring result of that year reappeared in his memory, and the angry scolding and ridicule of everyone were also vivid, and the noise became noisy, so noisy that he hugged his head weakly, not wanting to listen to it anymore.

"Waste? What's the scrap? Is it a missing arm or a broken leg? ”

“……”

Liu Jiangqing raised his eyes and glanced at Heng Dao's unreasonable complaint, but smiled bitterly, still holding his head with his hand uncomfortably, unable to say half a word.

"You're two seniors than me, so you should be 25 years old now."

"Hmmm......"

Liu Jiangqing typed out a word in response, not knowing what he wanted to say.

"At 25 years old, it's the prime of a professional player. It's a pity that I didn't live long enough to be GG. You know, one of the great things about being in the game is that you have a lot of time to think. No eating, no sleeping, no things to disturb. So in the past few months, the question I have thought about the most is why God doesn't let me possess people, but is a game character? ”

Lu Yunqian trembled in her heart when she saw this text, and suddenly covered her mouth, and the hot tears flowed down again after the tears just now.

"I thought about it, and then I finally came up with an answer, God probably likes to play fierce battles too, and he doesn't want the champions of the next ten years to be mine, so he accepted me first. But I still have a younger sister to take care of, and I didn't get the championship that I promised my teammates, so why am I willing to just go. So I struggled, and I said I didn't want to die, I wanted to go back. God couldn't resist my stubborn temper, so he had to throw me on the body of Heng Dao Yijian, so that I couldn't win the championship directly, but I could chat with Sissi in the game, do you say it's cheap? ”

Seeing a ghost complaining about his encounter like this for the first time, Liu Jiangqing was shocked and a little sad for Heng Dao at the same time. He stared at the young swordsman in the game for a long time, and his heart was mixed, and it was hard to imagine how strong his heart must be for this junior who was two years younger than himself to calmly face the matter between life and death, and tell it as easily as a story.

"Actually, having said all this, I just want to tell you one thing: whether in life or after death, I never thought of giving up the fierce battle. You now have the most enviable things for me, but you lightly say that you are a waste and want to give up, which will really make me look down on you from the bottom of my bones. ”

Looking at the large number of words flashing out of the game, Liu Jiangqing's face was full of shame, and the noisy voice in his head gradually disappeared, almost inaudible. He had already understood the painstaking efforts of Heng Dao Yijian to arrange those three competitions, but he was completely unsure of his current self, let alone that there was a chance to return to the competitive circle, so he hesitated and knocked out the words in his heart for many years.

"Envy me, except for this skin, all I have is inferiority after conceit, what is there to envy. The 0:10 match was the only time I was stumbling on something I was proud of, and I was hit very hard. After retiring, many people thought that Mingyue Pavilion was unfair, and they also thought that I hated Mingyue Pavilion. Actually, I did have hatred for Mingyue Pavilion in the year I left, but later I found out that I didn't hate Mingyue Pavilion, but I was ashamed of Mingyue Pavilion. ”

"Mingyue Pavilion didn't do anything wrong, I had become a waste of wood in that situation back then, and it was indeed a 'state decline'. It's like a flash in the pan, my competitive talent is only 23 years old for just one year, and after that, I'm just an ordinary person. Unlike you, you have inexhaustible self-confidence and strength, and you can turn over on your own no matter what kind of adversity you encounter. You are what I envy. ”

After Liu Jiangqing said this, she unexpectedly did not feel embarrassed, but felt relaxed in her muscles and bones, as if she had been relieved of the burden on her body, the sores were no longer painful, and even her breathing was much easier. Looking at the large text that had just been sent out on the screen, he suddenly shook his head slightly, he couldn't believe that he had said the things buried deep in his heart so easily, which had not been done in many years.

"So you stayed away from the professional world after you retired and didn't go to any more teams?" Heng Dao asked with a sword.

"Yes." Liu Jiangqing smiled miserably, and no longer hidden, "I have seen through myself, I am indeed a waste, I don't have the ability to take this road, so I won't go." ”

"Exactly, hey, do you see the words at my feet?" Heng Dao said with a sword.

Liu Jiangqing was stunned for a moment, and pulled her perspective closer to the feet of Heng Dao Yijian, there was nothing but green grass and leaves.

"No words." Liu Jiangqing replied truthfully.

"Professional waste collection, can't you see such a big five words?" Heng Dao said mischievously.

“……”

Liu Jiangqing was speechless, only to feel that this guy and his sister were surprisingly similar in terms of funny, and they were so unbelievable.

"Whether a waste is a waste or not depends on what the person who collects the waste says, and the waste itself cannot define itself as a waste." Heng Dao's sword flashed out a line of words again, "Tomorrow morning at eight o'clock, come to the game, I will personally identify you." ”