I've been thinking about publishing a single chapter for a long time, but I haven't written it, because I can't put it down, and because I feel that expecting to be understood is an extremely immature idea.

There have been a lot of rewards recently.,For a long time.,Maybe it's right to say that,Since this book was put on the shelves.,All kinds of rewards have continued.,It's not an exaggeration to describe it.,There are a lot of money spent by the brother of the soldier in the military service.,There are many local tyrant readers who spend a lot of money to ask for more.,More is a swipe that I can't count.。

Thank you!

I feel that in addition to saying thank you here, the best reward is to write hard and code well.

But......

There are many things that I need to explain, and I have the responsibility to explain them, whether everyone understands them or spit on them, when I decide to write down these truest thoughts in my heart, I am ready to respond positively to all the rights and wrongs.

The following two paragraphs are highlighted, don't get me wrong:

The first thing to explain and guarantee is to rest assured that this book will not be a eunuch and will not be unfinished, which is certain, and it is also my minimum bottom line as a writer.

The second thing I want to say is that in the days to come, I will try to keep changing, and write as much as I can.

I promise that I have said that, and I can't tell you what I want to say next.

The creative process is hard, how hard is it? If you don't go deep into this line, you can't deeply appreciate the $∟ long $∟ wind $∟ Wen $∟ learning, f±≠t, and the hard work of each author is not the same, people have different trivialities, troubles and troubles, and there are constantly unexpected emergencies in real life, and once someone chases the book, it is inevitable that the negative evaluation, all of the above are sources of stress.

It's a muddy road that gets deeper and deeper, with the strong running fast and the weak struggling.

I am a person who disdains to show weakness on the outside, and this kind of inner is extremely inconsistent with my appearance, which often makes people have the illusion that talking online and meeting offline are completely two people.

For a long time before today, I was embarrassed to cry in front of my closest friends, and I was afraid to show my unbearable and vulnerable side, which would not only make people feel stressed, but also have no right to throw negative emotions out on others.

But now when I write these words, the emotion is more of a relief.

Resonating with people is an extremely difficult thing in itself, and there are no two leaves that are exactly the same, and no two souls are perfectly compatible.

However, I choose to say these things to you, and my readers listen, and even many of them are unknown to my parents.

Why?

Because there is no one who can get closer to an author than the readers who have chased this book all the way to the present, the words narrated by each author often directly reflect his inner intuitive thoughts, and being read and liked is a manifestation of spiritual resonance.

I am determined and a little stubborn that you who can like the book and follow it all the way to this day can best understand what I want to express at this moment.

The readership is huge, maybe as young as 10 years old, maybe not much different from me.

A large part of the readership group prefers to chase books silently, and does not leave comments and group interactions, and never falls behind when contributing subscriptions.

As a full-length work published on the platform of China Literature, it has slowly gathered many people in the past ten months from May last year to October now.

The cultivation of China Literature, the appreciation of the editors, and the expectations of readers have pushed this book step by step to a height that I, as a new author, never imagined.

How can I live up to such high expectations?

The further I went through this book, the more difficult it became to write, and the large number of big pitfalls and all kinds of immature ideas that I was not mature in all my minds, made me feel more and more deeply about how small my ability was.

Can I navigate this style of writing in my first book, and how long it is a bit beyond my means?

I don't know, I can only take one step at a time, keep innovating, keep reflecting, keep improving, and try to do it if I can't do it.

I have always held this idea, and I have always tried to make myself a mature author, not only to write well, but also to guide young readers to have the correct three views.

And then......

This morning, I suddenly felt a huge amount of stress, several times more than before, and the emotions that I used to be able to calm down suddenly became extremely restless, and I was so anxious that I couldn't do anything.

I didn't know who to talk to, but I found a senior who took good care of me and asked for help.

When I spoke my distress in confusing and illogical terms, the senior blurted out four words that made me cry for a moment.

He said, "Your heart is troubled."

Many things that I don't want to admit and dare not show are reflected in these four words.

Last month, I didn't sleep for 40 hours on two days in early September.

For nearly half a month from mid-September to the end of the month, I slept 23 hours a day, and my spirit was extremely sluggish and I looked tired.

Occupational diseases, cervical spine problems, lower back problems, mental problems, insomnia, neurasthenia, a lot of comments and comments on online violence, I have all ......

Even I'm here to say a very difficult sentence that I don't want to face the last thing I want to face:

Twenty-two Daoliu turned out to be a female author! No wonder the more you write, the more water girls are verbose!

Including the editors who took me, they were also surprised before the recent photos were revealed, and it turned out that the author who wrote the big return was a girl?

I never wanted to reflect the fragile side of girls in front of others, and before that, I never sought to be considerate of such a thing as gender, because I felt that once I did this, I was avoiding myself and regressing myself, facing the problems that should be solved, slacking off and getting the understanding and preferential treatment that normal male authors did not have.

It's not fair.

Now that I have been enlightened by speaking out, I have also faced up to my own weakness, I am not so powerful and strong, and sometimes I am even very ignorant and small.

If I want to be tolerant and understanding, to feel warmth and love, I can't find a better group to give me these than the readers who have been supporting me.

So I wasted my time writing so much nonsense.

Finally, thank you for your likes and support, and thank you to all the readers who have encouraged me to support and criticize the mistakes.

In the future, I will no longer run away from problems, I will accept my shortcomings well, and I will face my heart correctly.

Thank you!

Oh yes, there is