Chapter 295: Longing for Freedom (3)

(3) A pure and immaculate smile

The saddest thing in life doesn't seem to be the loss of freedom, thinking about Zhang Xueliang, who has lost his freedom, has lived longer than anyone else, and what is even more depressing is that he has eaten, drunk, prostituted, gambled, and had all five drugs.

Is it possible to attribute the longevity of this centenarian to the nourishment of love? Freedom is precious, but love is more valuable; if it is for life, both can be thrown away?

In order to surpass my great-grandmother's ideal of living a long life, should I be like the netizens voted for - disciplining my husband and managing my marriage? Leave all the freedom, love, and love in my dreams behind, no longer regret and frustration, continue to flatter and scold myself in front of my face, and then laugh at myself, and strive to maintain a hypocritical marriage?

I don't care about all his bad deeds, because I don't care about him at all, and he has had nothing to do with me in soul since the moment he slept with another woman.

But after many years, I still write as if it had just happened, and it seems that I still can't let go, an invisible scar in the depths of my soul, an indescribable pain?

Is it because there was love?

Looking at him riding home in the rain, still carrying the food he bought on the road, a damp warmth rose in his heart.

Maybe it's because I'm used to indulging my feelings, maybe it's because the coveting of food triggers an unnatural gratitude? Maybe it's all and it's neither.

In short, it's been a long time since I've had this feeling of warmth. Over the years, everything he has done seems to me to be atonement, and I have always told him that there is no need to do this, that he should pursue what he loves, and not let the past conventions constrain his thoughts and actions, and I have completely let go. If I continue to keep the promise, it will be a kind of torture for me.

For 800 years, I have been a well-behaved person, working in the sun, sleeping peacefully in the night, and I have never experienced a truly severe test. has never vigorously loved someone who should not be loved.

My heart has always been quietly placed in the depths of my soul, the place where the soul is received, and there is a quiet beauty.

I admire my heart, it is sincere and calm, it keeps coming out with ethereal and ethereal verses, and every upright person will say that such verses are born only in a pure and selfless heart.

There has always lived a man in my heart, his eyes were as clear as a horse, and his eyes had the clear light of the blue sky, very gentle and pleasant, as if he was remembering good things. He smiled slightly, and the flowers of the whole world would bloom.

I like to look at his clean appearance, like a child who has not grown up, and like a green apple that has just been picked, fresh, smooth, and not a little dusty. Whenever I think of him, my heart will be peaceful, like a warrior who is not afraid of danger, although my heart is surging, but my eyes are firm.

He is completely different from my husband, Mr. Pei, who loves beautiful food, he will make me cry at any time, and the moment the tears flow, all the pain and exhaustion of my body and mind are swept away......

It is impossible to see him in this life, he is only in my dreams, and no man in the world can be similar to him, I freeze the memories of eight hundred years at the moment when he smiles, and if we meet in the next life, we must not miss it!