Chapter 608: Chips

（33）

I believe that the noblest act of man, in addition to spreading the truth, is to publicly renounce error.

Some people may not think that I am spreading the truth, but I am afraid that I will not object to me that I am openly renunciating my mistakes.

I am reflecting on the trajectory of my life in the past 40 years, I have always thought that I have lived a noble life, but I did not expect that in the eyes of others, I have always hoped that my relatives will live a little better through my efforts, but I did not expect that they are not satisfied.

But when I really stopped loving myself, except for coding 2,000 words on the Internet every day, and no longer giving myself other tasks and pressure, everything changed. The seemingly happy marriage and harmonious interpersonal relationships are like suddenly tearing off the veil of hypocrisy, everyone is telling me to shut up, and even the website has canceled the blog channel.

When I received a phone call, I scolded, "You are a psycho, why are you writing about our family's affairs? You are waiting for us to see you in court!" I had to say in Mandarin, "Who are you?"

At this time last year, I also made up my mind to give up looking for the root cause and watched Taiwan's idol drama "Destined to Fall in Love with You", but I didn't expect Hunan Satellite TV to introduce it as a New Year's drama this year. There is a classic line in the play: Life is like a gamble, it is impossible to win everything, as long as the chips are in your hands, there will always be hope.

I was thinking, what are my chips? I thought I had figured out the rules of the stock market, just like one cannot transcend the trajectory of destiny predicted by one's own birthdate. However, they said that the old man who watched the bicycle at the door of the securities company would also speculate in stocks: he would buy stocks when he saw that there were almost no more people who stored his cars, and he would sell stocks when he saw that the stock was full every day. That's not my forte.

My voice is said to be suitable for being an operator, specializing in seducing others to call and cheat information consultation fees. That's against my conscience.

My thinking is even more outdated, and the family's method of calculating wisdom teeth and life expectancy seems ridiculous to others. A simple physiological fact is that men's sexual function peaks before the age of 20 and declines after the age of 20, while women "get better" after the age of 40. There has long been a saying among the people that "thirty is like a wolf, and forty is like a tiger".

In foreign countries, it has become fashionable to have old women and young men, the 51-year-old singer Madonna's new love is only 23 years old, the movie star Demi Moore has changed to a boyfriend who is 15 years younger than herself, and the director Taylor Wood is engaged to the 19-year-old male lead in her film......

And some people think that my nagging itself is a kind of physiological dissatisfaction, and there is actually a sophomore high school student who was invited by QQ, and revealed that he had had it with his mother, and it felt very cool.

I always thought that I had to write misery to gain sympathy because I was drawn to leave a message that expressed anguish or despair.

The chat after the message made me feel love and happiness, but it turned out that the other party didn't love me, so where did my feelings of love and joy that lasted for a month or two come from?