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She woke up

It's like suddenly seeing a light that doesn't light it, but breaks through the door

Surrounded by the milky smell of butter lamps

The scent is a kind of dust, just very fine and very fine, like a liquid, but without weight, flowing straight from the tip of the flame, like the wind blowing streamers, drifting at will, drifting to the roof, blackening the beams, inhaling into the nose, and staining the lungs

She doesn't get tired of this filth, she doesn't love this smell, she just feels it quietly, lets this smell come and go, and with the smell she has lungs and nose

She blinked, her eyes cold, sour, astringent, and closed again, and in her ears was the sound of the wind and the wind was dark

The black when she didn't wake up was sweet, and when she woke up, the taste was gone, and there was only a sweet aftertaste, and sometimes she felt as if she had never had an aftertaste, and she hadn't had a black aftertaste, and she hadn't been black, but because she longed for it, she gave the part that was unknown to her consciousness black, and gave it a sweet taste

Silence is dark sweet Silence is beautiful

The Buddha loves the silence, and she loves the silence too

She's not closing her eyes, she's not opening them, she wants to close them, she doesn't open them, she's landing, her heart has nowhere to live, it's this silence, she doesn't have her eyelids, she doesn't have herself

She looked at the blackness in her eyes, which were ordinary blacks, and because of these eyes, they were filled with turbid water, so they couldn't see the world as it was, just as the sea was clear, but it was blue when you looked at it, and the sky was blue, and it was black through it

The sea is the eyes of man, and the universe is the world

Blue is an illusion, black is also a beauty, living in an illusion is a beauty, beauty is a stifling of life, it is a suffocating of the heart

As she sat down, she felt an itch rise up in her lower body, an itch born of a night's meditation, like a thousand grass budding under the skin, soft, tenaciously arched, and the power could knock over stones

Itching is a pain Pain is a force

The accumulation of pain can trigger the operation of the life force, just as blood always accumulates nutrients to the wound, and the pain accumulates deeply, and the life force will flourish like a whip horse

She couldn't remember how long she hadn't slept and had replaced sleep with meditation every night

From the perspective of spiritual practice, sleep is a kind of disease, the way to cure it is not to fall alone, that is, to never sleep at night, to never sleep, to be sick, to cure the process of disease, to cure the disease, and to die, which will wake up human beings

And she fell asleep just now She is not afraid, she does not regret, she does not regret Thinking is a thought, a thought can give birth to ten thousand thoughts, people only need to hold on to the present, and there is no need to chase the past

There was a light coming from outside the earthen window, and it was brighter than the butter lamps around it, like a tooth biting into the darkness, and the light was still the light, and it was the signal for the monks to get up

Her skin grinded like teeth, and she ate a huge gap, and on her side she ate a shadow, a portal to the universe, and the dark place was the sky

The dust became evident in the light and fell gently on her face, between each of her cold hairs, and it shook her skin with a loud sound, like the impact of stars on the earth, and the skin shook in countless impacts, cracked in some places, collapsed in other places, but quickly repaired itself, maybe ten years, maybe twenty years, and these impacts appeared in the form of spots and wrinkles to the naked eye, and you could feel the power of dust

Thousands of small grasses are growing, growing with vigor, and vigor is a kind of murderous energy

Growth is a kind of destruction, because transformation means disappearance

Outside, there was a sound in the distance, like a mountain of apples falling, the sound of felt boots slapping on the bricks, and as we got closer, the apples turned into oranges, and then feathers

She knew that people were coming in and she was not to be disturbed

It's only when you're close that your steps become lighter, and they've been disturbed for a long time, and these people don't realize that they're always covering their ears and stealing the bell

She felt that there were countless holes floating in the darkness in front of her, as if digging an anthill in the void, two by two, communicating with herself with her breath, she knew that behind the holes were faces one after another, some long, some round, some black, some purple, some old, some young, this is their ** attribute, and life should not have attributes

People began to chant in a low voice, and the sound was muffled and neat, floating above people's heads, like the warm waves of the sea

There was an amplitude on the cloth banner in the room, and it moved gently

"Milk Gema" a seven-year-old little bhikshuni approached her and whispered

It's not a call, it's a request

She didn't open her eyes, she just flipped the wrist that was held in the lotus mark on her left knee and flicked her fingers

A wisp of smoke and dust passed from your fingertips into the light

The little bhikshuni bowed her head and walked to the left side of the tall chair where she was sitting cross-legged, and squatted down and lifted the yellow silk cloth underneath it, and inside was a large wooden barrel, and directly above the barrel there was a hole in the chair that looked like a human face

The four legs of the chair symbolize the four major earth, fire, water, and wind support the human world The chair surface is the human world There are holes to indicate the non-reality of the human world And the Theravada Venerable One can communicate with the two worlds of yin and yang The little bhikshuni dragged the wooden barrel out and knelt down on one knee Reverently put ten together Then he reached into his hand on the edge of the barrel and stirred it like a dough The barrel emitted a faint smell and a curly smell Her wrist was stained with a yellowish brown sugar color and fine sand-like cooked barley powder

The little lamas of six or seven years old were running quickly through the porch, and they came in over the waist-high threshold, and they handed out dark wooden bowls to the people sitting on the floor, and then they came in with large teapots that were about one-third of their weight, and poured milk tea into each of them, and each bowl was only half a bowl, and then they ran down on their feet, and there was plenty of vitality in the footsteps

The little bhikshuni carried the bucket with all her left hand and with all her might, pulled her spine into a crooked bow, walked in front of the reciter's knees, and after each one, she put down the bucket, put her right hand into the bucket, took out a handful of semi-dry noodles and put them in the bowl, and then walked to the next person, and when the row was finished, she walked to the next row

Four rows of people can sit between two square pillars painted with red lacquer, and the pillars come in pairs, and they go deep into the darkness, as if the darkness were making red

The person who got the noodles closed his eyes and kept chanting the scriptures, and while he kept chanting, he put his black hand like a dried jujube branch into the wooden bowl, and gently grabbed and pinched the barley flour to suck up the milk tea ball, and pinched out a piece of mud that turned into a yellow and yellow piece of mud the size of a child's fist

These people are as white as snowmen, and they seem to be snowmen who don't need energy, but their skin has been assimilated into the earth, and they have lost their original human appearance

People recite the sutra and eat this piece of mud in small bites, as if the clay man is carefully mending himself

Hunger sobers people up, it's sinful to be fed, and it's this little piece of mud that will keep them through the middle of the day

After reciting the morning sutra, the snowmen withdrew neatly, she put away her handprint, sat down, opened her eyes, and a ray of morning light swept in from the earthen window, like a sword

The frost pierced through her snow-white and light vestment, reaching her skin, and her skin was like snow

Through this vestment, you can even see her reddish areola, and she doesn't need the cover of her underwear, because holiness cannot be covered, and the cover of the world is the depravity of the world

There was a slap on the outside, and she knew it was people asking each other, and she could tell what was suspicious and what was banter

She walked to the knee-high threshold and looked out of the house, and under the steps was an empty field, and beyond the white wall, the distant mountains were blue, like a man's strong arms, and the middle view of the wild plain was soft and blue, undulating like the back of a young girl

The beauty of the world will make people greedy

She closed her eyes and shut the world away

Like the speed of the sun walking in the sky, she turned and went upstairs, and upstairs on the left-hand side, huge cabinets filled one wall, and the window on the right-hand side was so high that the wall between the two windows was more like a pillar, and it couldn't even be fitted with a window, and the window was opposite the cabinet, and the sun crashed in like a flood, and was cut into large pieces by the window, and the light and shadow became angular and became the gears of light that snapped together with the window, and the sun walked through the bite of this gear

She went to the deepest part of the room, pulled over the escalator with three tiers of slides, climbed high in the middle of the cabinet, opened a compartment, took out the gold-encrusted scroll, came down, and sat cross-legged in the shadows under the window in the middle of the room

The sun pushes through the shadows, slowly and affectionately, approaching, creeping up her knees, her shoulders, and she remains focused, like a pointer in the center of a sundial

It was nearly noon, and there was a "stepping, stepping" sound downstairs, and somebody was smashing dung cakes, and then there was smoke in the sky, and there was the sound of grease kissing pots, and the smell of fried kasai wafted up

The sun shone on her face, revealing a long-hidden ferocity Her figure split the room Perfectly and well-balanced Footsteps came from the stairs A little lama of thirteen or fourteen years old grasped the edge of a black wooden tray and carefully brought a plate of kasai and a bowl of butter tea to her side, slowly squatted and knelt down, and lowered it gently

Every day for lunch, someone else has to serve, which is a blessing in their hearts

She looked at the little lama, and saw that he had a little pointed nose, and a pair of big eyes, and this face gave her a certain sense of familiarity, and a smile appeared on her face, and the little lama looked at her, and bowed to the floor, and the devotion was awe-inspiring

She smiled and reached out and wiped his dirty forehead lightly

The little lama's body froze, and he felt that his heavenly eyes were open, and he saw that the lotus flowers on her body were blooming, magnifying the light, and he had become Xue Dong, and his heart was pounding like Jia Luo, and a cavity of blood was surging like milk, and there was a round stain in the middle and lower part of his white robe that was expanding and deepening, as if it had been separated from the ghee, and the soup flowed down his knees, dripping to the edge of the black wooden tray, and he panicked, and hurriedly wiped it with his sleeve, and kept kowtowing

But instead of blaming, she gently patted his head as a sign of comfort

The little lama suddenly quieted down, feeling that the hand was the hand of the Buddha and Bodhisattva, slender and white, with a softness and warmth that was not found in the world

After the meal, she continued to look through the scrolls

The little lama had dried himself at the window before the tray was withdrawn, and that was what she meant, lest anyone see him and he would be punished

The sun is also slowly leaving, like a lover who is gradually changing his heart, quietly reclaiming everything he has given to all beings

She was not sad, as if the sun had given her, and she had never received it

When the light was completely dark, she put the scroll away, went downstairs, took her dress, and sat down on her Mahagara chair, and after a while, the sound of apples falling to the ground sounded, and the room was filled with snowmen

The scriptures are in the air, lacking the vitality of the morning, because the body needs to store its energy to survive the night

An hour later, the little bhikshunis prepare their instruments and the snowmen hold bells and drums, close their eyes and chant sutras, light a bonfire outside the courtyard, and the smell of dung cakes and smoke rise into the night sky

She silently recited "Koga Yasamaza" and remained seated, pulled her left foot up, hung her heel on the back of her neck, leaned back, and pinched out a mantra with both hands like a peacock's head, showing the lotus image of the Holy Dew on the chair

A snowman in the front row stood up with his head bowed, put his palms together, and approached with the chant "Hum Bazar Sado" Lifted the hem of his robe and looked at the Lotus of the Holy Dew Holding the vajra pestle lightly and touching Visualizing the white nectar flowing into her body in the lotus flower Washing away all the stench, blood, and sin She stretched out her right leg and hooked it on the snowman's waist and began the empowerment Her eyelids were half-closed Like a small mouth sipping the light, and visualizing her own qi veins in her heart Forehead, chest, abdomen, and crotch All the way along the way, the qi veins passed through The bright points lit up like lamps One by one, the golden bells were bright and the sound of the drum She followed this path into the other person's body to find wisdom But all I saw was a frenzy and a blankness, which was just an impermanent emotion, which could easily fade away, and could not be as eternal as wisdom

Sure enough, the snowman's mania quickly faded, and he retreated abruptly and replaced himself with the next one

In the corner of the pillar on the right, a little lama secretly opened his eyes and looked forward while chanting the scriptures, and found that the half-open and half-closed eyes of the Buddha mother seemed to be looking at him, with a smile on her face, and she was so happy for a moment that she forgot to shake the golden bell in her hand

The empowerment lasted until late at night, and none of the twelve snowmen had enough wisdom to signal the end of the puja with a gentle wave of her hand

The snowmen were ashamed to bow and repent, and they retreated and left, and the little bhikshuni brought a pure gold bowl to wash her body, and then offered the bowl in front of the Buddha, which is the water used to make milk tea tomorrow morning, and it needs the blessing and purification of the Buddha's power

She put down the legs on the back of her neck, recoiled them, stretched her vestment in front of her, covered her body, and behind the golden bowl, the yellow wood carving of the six-armed Mahagala statue had a cold and dark face, with a devilish hideousness

The little bhikshuni went out, brought in the wooden barrel refilled with cooked barley flour, sugar, and qula, squatted down beside her, lifted the yellow cloth, pushed the bucket under the chair, and then retreated and bowed, and turned away

The bonfire in the courtyard has been extinguished, and Aomori's moonlight has poked in through the earthen window, carving her into a Buddha statue

She exhaled softly in her heart, folded her hands and fingers together, and closed her eyes

Tomorrow will still be such a day